A New View

Its something how death comes into play. One minute your talking, laughing and joking. And the next, your planning a funeral.

Life is so quick. I know for me. It was a blow in the stomach. My cousin (as mist may or may not now by now) Daron passed away this year, and i still have mixed feelings about the whole thing. I was VERY close to my cousin. I know when we were younger, we had our differences. But as we got older, we put that aside and became closer than ever.

I wanted to be more than a cousin to him. I wanted to be a close friend. I wanted him to say (later in life) that no matter what anyone said or what went on, I could always talk to my cousin, She was always the one that kept me on my toes. (Even though I was older than her by a couple of months).

Of course that never got to take place. I would always call him and make sure that he was ok. Make sure that he knew that I loved him. Make sure that he knew that I was proud of him.

The last time I saw him alive was Thanksgiving of 08' and when everyone was going home, he gave me a hug and I didn't realize how strong that hug was,until now. He gave me a hug and picked me up. And said that he would see me that next weekend. (We had made plans to see each other that next weekend. Me him and my sister. We never got to see him that weekend but I had assume we would see him again that next Thanksgiving.

Well, now as I see my family and friends. I call them more and give long hugs and kisses. Because i know see that you never know if you will see them again. Now that I think of it. Maybe that is was my grandfather was talking about when he told me to call my great-grandmother (of my mother's side), when SHE was alive. I heard what my grandfather was saying but i never truly understood it until now. I think that is what Tyrese meant also. I notice that when my family tells me things it doesn't stick until someone like Tyrese (or life in general), says it.

Its interesting, I love how Tyrese talks about his personal issues and experiences (rather church or life) to his fans so that they can put it into their lives. I am able to better understand things much better with SayNow than I have if I listen to a family member.

I don't quite understand life or death. But I have more of an outlook of things now than I ever have before as a child or as an adult. I have heard Chris Brown and Brandy both say that they are human. That they are still learning, and I guess I am too. I still have my sad crying moments dealing with my cousins passing. I just hope that I can get it together.

I have a different opinion on things and I think that i don't see eye to eye on certain topics and things in life. That is the reason why I am writing and doing this blog, so that I can have other views and people can share their sight on things and comment on my topic. Maybe have a normal conversation as to arguing about what we disagree on.